Constant Salt to a Wound.
5/7 days I work on cooling my blood as it boils, as i sit between you and your new girlfriend.
With you I broke two of my rules that I have lived by since I was 16, now 25.
Rule #1: Never get involved with someone from the three legged species who is younger than you.
Rule #2: Never eat where you shit; meaning never date, love, or have sex with someone you work/ go to school with , and have to see on a daily basis.
I laugh because I remember thinking, eh, he’s “different.”
I was right. You and I are very different.
It wasn’t like we just met and started dating. Like I said we see each other 5/7 days and in our field we analyze the human body, critique it and rehabilitate it. Our line of work had us up close and personal whether we like it or not but we did. For each touch between us created a nice bulge for you and a piercing of my nipples through my shirts every time. Being “professional” is a must and everyone must be sure not to demonstrate otherwise. While on stage we followed the rules and played the part but behind the curtains we made our own.
After weeks of flirting, making eye contact, and secretly talking with long stares and smiles, I said, “fuck it” and made the first move.
I couldn’t do all the work so I let you pursue.
And so it began. A Dream that became a Reality soon into a Nightmare.
Tall, chiseled body of David with a dick and strength that made me speak in tongues and a sex drive that matched mine. Was it this that “got me?” Honestly NO, I can honestly say I have had all this before. HOWEVER, he was the first of the three legged species I Admired and Respected at that time.
Attentive, loving, a gentleman, friend and lover he was to me and yes oh yes it happened, I allowed it, out of all the men and relationships I ever experienced this time it was my turn and I was hooked, I can’t lie.
His physical strength mixed with intelligence turned me on like no other. And on top of it all he made it known to everyone I was his, could I be so lucky?
Our time together=a little over a month, short and sweet?
Within 48hrs a 360 occurred. This warm, loving, attentive person became ice cold and distant. If others didn’t witness everything, I would think to have imagined everything.
So for weeks while feeling a tornado inside of emotions, I prepped myself every day for those 5 days; head up, shoulders back, smile, and stay focused on what’s important.
But I needed closure or some sort of reasonable explanation. OK, so there’s someone else, there has to be. Either that or you are secretly gay. I just needed the truth.
So I swallowed my pride and knocked on the door.
Just please “Keep it real.” I remember saying, “I just need the truth I don’t like being in the dark.”
His response, “You are more than what I could have ever hoped for or imagined, but I am not ready to fall in love or be in a serious relationship even though I thought I was. You’re beautiful, smart, loving and fun. But I’m not ready”
Bullshit, tell me the truth.
“That is the truth. I’m “scared.” Just give me time. That’s all I need. Two weeks.”
More than two weeks later I now sit, 5/7 days next to your new girlfriend and watch you treat her the way you did to me. It’s just an unnecessary constant reminder.
Constant salt to a wound trying to heal.
I’ve wiped my tears.
No person defines who you are.
And I truly believe you receive all the good and bad that you give in return.
As long as I can cool off my boiling blood for 5/7 days, and remember and nurture the truth and spirit inside me, this three legged species must count his lucky stars he still has three legs.
Namaste ;)
Submitted by mariposavr
Random Daze theme by Polaraul
